Both ‘se souvenir’ and ‘se rappeler’ are used to talk about remembering in French, but they are not used the same way grammatically – here’s which one to use and some of the common mistakes to avoid.
French has two different verbs to talk about memory, but they have different grammatical rules, while only one is used in instructions or issuing verbal reminders.
Here’s how they work;
Se souvenir de + object
The verb se souvenir means “to keep something or someone in one’s memory” – it is a reflexive verb (so is conjugated with je me, tu te etc) and it always requires the preposition de.
Examples:
Je me souviens de ce jour. – I remember that day.
Je me souviens de ce film. – I remember that movie.
Since se souvenir is used with de, we can replace its object with the pronoun en.
Example:
“Tu te souviens de cette chanson?”, “Oui, je m’en souviens bien.” – “Do you remember this song?”, “Yes I remember it well”.
But if the pronoun refers to a person, you must use a personal pronoun (moi, toi, lui, elle).
Example:
“Tu te souviens de cette fille?”, “Oui, je me souviens d’elle.” – “Do you remember that girl?”, “Yes, I remember her”.
“Tu te souviens de moi ?”, “Oui, je me souviens de toi.” – Do you remember me? Yes, I remember you
You can also use the pronoun dont which means which.
Example:
C’est une chose dont je ne me souviens pas. – That’s something I don’t remember.
The relative pronoun dont replaces a complement introduced by de. – Je ne me souviens pas de cette chose. (I don’t remember that thing)
Cheat code
If you’re wanting to express that you don’t remember something, the verb oublier (to forget) is not reflexive and is therefore simpler to conjugate.
Je ne me souviens pas (I don’t remember) becomes J’oublie or – in the past tense – J’ai oublié.
Why is remembering reflexive while forgetting isn’t? Er, look, we never claimed that French makes sense.
Se rappeler + direct object
The verb se rappeler means “to have in one’s mind or memory a recollection of someone or something”.
This another reflexive verb (so use je me, tu te etc) but this one is used with a direct object (COD in French). In this case, no preposition is used.
French grammar tip: Figuring out direct and indirect objects
Examples:
C’est avec nostalgie que je me rappelle les vacances de ma jeunesse. – I look back on the vacations of my youth with nostalgia.
Ça me rappelle mon enfance. – That reminds me of my childhood.
Its complement is replaced by a direct object pronoun.
Example:
“Tu te rappelles ce poème?”, “Oui, je me le rappelle parfaitement.” – “Do you remember this poem?”, “Yes, I remember it perfectly.”
The verb se rappeler is sometimes preceded by the relative pronoun que.
Example:
C’est un film que je me rappelle souvent. – It’s a movie I often think back on.
In this case, que replaces the direct object.
However, se rappeler can sometimes be followed by a preposition:
Je ne me rappelle pas à qui j’ai parlé. – I don’t remember who I spoke to.
Je ne me rappelle pas de qui nous avons parlé. – I don’t remember who we talked about.
In particular, it can be followed by the preposition de when it is followed by a pronoun referring to a person.
Example:
Je me rappelle de lui. – I remember him.
In this case, when referring to a person, you cannot say je m’en rappelle – even though a lot of French speakers say it.
This mistake is common and, according to the Académie Française, stems from confusion with the verb se souvenir. And it is worth noting that the verb se rappeler can sometimes also be used with de.
Se rappeler de + past infinitive
For example, when it is followed by a present infinitive that expresses an action one must not forget to perform.
Example:
Il doit se rappeler de tout ranger avant le retour de ses parents. – He must remember to clean everything before his parents come back.
It also works with a past infinitive.
Je me rappelle de lui avoir dit. – I remember telling him.
Also used when the object is a personal pronoun.
Example:
Je me rappelle très bien de lui. – I remember him well.
Choosing between the two
As we’ve seen, it’s not always easy to distinguish between se souvenir and se rappeler and use them correctly.
Generally they can be used fairly interchangeably when used to reminisce about something, but se rappeler can also be used its non-reflexive form: rappeler.
The verb rappeler is widely used in French and has several meanings depending on context, but perhaps the most common is in issuing instructions/reminders.
In it’s ‘reminder’ form it’s usually a slightly politer way of issuing instructions – nous vous rappelons qu’il est interdit de fumer dans le bar – we remind you that smoking is prohibited in the bar.
You might also see ‘pour rappel‘ on signs or in letters/emails from official bodies.
For example, “pour rappel, la date limite de dépôt des dossiers approche” – “as a reminder, the applications deadline is coming up”
In the professional context, it is common to see the phrase “pour rappel la réunion est à 14h” – “Reminding you the meeting is at 2pm.”
It is usually a polite tone and used in formal contexts but people use it also in more casual situations.
Example:
Pour rappel, c’est moi qui cuisine ce soir – “Don’t forget I’m cooking tonight”
In casual speech, it can be slightly playful or teasing.
However it also has other uses, it can also means to phone someone back (faut que je le rappelle – I need to call him back, or rappelez-moi, s’il vous plaît – please call me back, which is a common ending to voicemail messages)
It can also express resemblance (cette femme me rappelle ma mère – this woman reminds me of my mother) and finally it can evoke a memory (cette atmosphère me rappelle les Noëls de mon enfance – this atmosphere reminds me of the Christmases of my childhood.)
You can find the full Grammar tips series HERE.
